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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"Family" means different things to different people.  My in-laws don't include extras in the family photo until they are married.  I spent Christmas with his family while we were engaged - just a few months shy of our wedding - and I'm not in that family photo. I am in the one from the following year.  My in-laws are wonderful people, we get along great,  they are warm and loving and welcoming.  But their tradition is that the "family photo" is ... just family.  It's a clear line, nobody has to wonder who "counts" or worry that one kid's SO is being treated differently from another's.

In other words, the photo thing is only a big deal if you are reading more into it than just the photo. [/quote]

That's ridiculous.  Maybe this made sense in the era of film etc, but with digital cameras, taking one extra photo with the GF is hardly an issue.  Also photoshop exists should they break up and you want to remove her.

My mother's attitude was always "this is just a snapshot of our family at the time".  We had formal family photos taken when my grandmother was clearly declining.  The group shot had my cousin's fiance in it and my brother's then long time girlfriend.  The photographer offered some without her, but my mom declined.  They've all been married over 20 years at this point.  And the good will goes much further than any pettiness.[/quote]

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