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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Your husband should do what my friend does with her older and irresponsible sister and her enabling sibling:

1. Pay specific bills you are OK with paying, like medical bills, water, electricity or groceries. Not the cable or anything you want her to drop or reduce.

2. Tell the siblings that you refuse to fund a ridiculous lifestyle when you need to save for your own family. They can do what they want, but you're not going to send a blank check for frivolous spending.

It's a win-win, because that way your husband still helps his mother; but he gets to help only on the critical stuff without enabling her; and he preserves his wealth for his own nuclear family.

Otherwise she's going to bleed you all dry, and live to a 110.

[/quote]

If he pays the important bills that will leave her with her income to buy the other stupid stuff.  Doesn't seem like such a good idea to me.  It is enabling her.[/quote]

Yes but it's also a set amount.  $10k will cover many years of a cell phone bill.  Writing huge checks is a way worse idea.  If the siblings have already helped out, I'd take over a few bills and then keep the door open for discussing living within her means.  If she refuses, well ok.

[/quote]

I would put $5K in an account, auto-bill the cell phone from it, and refuse to do any more until she downgrades her lifestyle.

If the siblings were throwing money into this gravitational black hole, that's their misfortune.[/quote]

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