Reply to What Did Your MIL Do to Welcome You Into the Family?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Pay attention to who she actually is. If she doesn’t like the spotlight or a lot of focused attention, she might not want a big gesture. Think about her as an individual person, not some abstract “what my DIL should be.” Is she an introvert or an extrovert? Does she like to talk about herself, or is she a bit guarded? Let that inform how you approach this. A nice heartfelt note is a very kind gesture that anyone would like. Do not say anything about being her mom now or something.[/quote]

This. This. This.
My MIL was overwhelming when we first got engaged. She went right into planning mode and I felt swept along in her energy. She also knew I came from a rocky home life so she thought she would "save" me by volunteering to be my new mom. I was already an adult working through family issues in therapy, her savior approach was also overwhelming. Her heart was in the right place but my advice would be to respond to who this woman is beyond your new daughter-in-law.

It's sweet that you're asking here, though.[/quote]

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