Reply to Going back to work after SAH with zero regrets

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I left a demanding career to SAH almost ten years ago, and I’m now considering going back to work in a lower-pressure field related to my old career.

Although I’m excited about the possible change, I feel like I keep having casual conversations with others that suggest if I’m going back to work I must somehow regret having stayed home. Which isn’t true, at all. I treasure the years I had at home, but my kids are older now and I still have a long life ahead of me. How would you respond to someone who suggests I must regret the last ten years? Or worse, thinks that because I’m going back to work it’s suddenly ok to belittle SAHMs to me? Does anyone else have experience with this? It puts me in such an awkward situation.[/quote]

I have three kids and have always worked, but am lucky enough to have been able to progress up the ladder while being in remote positions at F500 companies and now a FAANG. I bring my kids to school and see them all the time when they are in and out (we have a FT nanny, so it's not like I provide childcare during the workday) and I love it and feel so connected to them. I can't imagine going into a hybrid or FT in-office role until my youngest is older, so I understand to an extent the pull of wanting to be home when they are young. I would never think someone transitioning back to the workforce when their youngest was in ES or MS was due to their not liking their work. I would assume it was due to them being needed in a different way by their kids and wanting to do something professionally fulfilling/interesting now that they were needed in a different way and had the space to take that on.

People who feel the need to make comments about others choices in this area (and most areas) are insecure about their own choices and/or are seeking validation, so just remind yourself of that. When I'm uncomfortable with where people are going I basically don't respond or just say "mmm" and then change the subject. I know a lot of people on DCUM suggest cutting rejoinders but if these are people you see on the daily it's probably not worth to tell them off. [/quote]

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