Reply to Tell me everything about Grace Episcopal School in Kennsignton

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[quote=Anonymous]I agree: we heard nothing but positive feedback about the school and we were extremely excited about the opportunity. The school is close to our home and they gave us the most generous 'financial aid' (they call it something else) package of any school. We liked the head of school a lot. It seemed like an obvious winner. I can't remember all the details of our experience off the top of my head (I have notes with details I could find if you are interested), but I can say that we connected with a long time Grace family from the school whose child was in my older child's class to confirm all of the upsetting things our oldest daughter (9) was telling us. The family also gave us a lot of background information about the school and this particular class; I can't even begin to express how upset and duped I felt getting off the phone. I should say that we did not pick the school because it is Episcopal/Christian and we did not want a militant, rigid learning environment. We wanted a supportive, nurturing, child-centered, progressive environment. We wanted our children to enjoy going to school every day; we wanted our children to enjoy learning and to develop critical thinking skills. The other schools we applied to were local Friends and Progressive schools. We knew the least about Grace and applied last minute (after the deadline) based almost entirely on all of the good things people said about the school online.

The main problem, for us, was that our daughter was not experiencing anything close to the environment we expected based on the way the school sold itself. Again, I would need to check my notes to make sure I don't mess up any of the specifics, and this was all from the first week (four days) of school, but there was: group punishment and/or the threat of group punishment beginning on the first day of school, there was a child that was clearly mistreated by a number of classmates and the teacher (including the teacher threatening to throw his work in the trash when he did not follow directions), the children had to repeatedly line up in a required way and when they failed to do it properly (often) they had to go back and do it again, the 'quiet corner' (or whatever it was called at the school) was used to punish/with the threat of punishment vs a place children could go when they needed a break. This was all confirmed by the other family - they asked their child about things they weren't sure of and filled in a lot of context during our 1-1.5 hour phone call - and they hoped we would push for change at the school. There was no way we were going to send our daughter back to this school. Perhaps some people want this for their children and that's fine; it is not at all what we want for our children and we were perfectly clear about our expectations when we applied. When I spoke with the head of the school, she denied everything. She would not even consider what I was telling her. She kept saying, essentially, that Grace is a wonderful school and that things like this don't happen there. She did not address any of our concerns and, had I not spoken to the other family, I would have questioned my daughter's account of things (and I can't tell you how upsetting I found this). She was clearly very annoyed that we had spoken to another family prior to talking to her.

Off the top of my head, other general problems I had that I wouldn't have known about: I expected other students to live in the area and I was shocked at how far away most lived. The school changed all the teachers at the last minute and without explanation. I don't understand this and was extremely upset by it. We were specifically interested in our children being taught by the teachers listed (one of them had a very long history of teaching the grade at the school). The family I spoke to theorized about why the school might have done this (I won't get into this), but we were not happy. My daughter's class was something like 11 boys and 4 girls (including her); we thought it might be ok, but it wasn't (I am sleep deprived from kids being sick, but I am trying to watch what I say).

Other more general things that reinforced this was not the right school for us: my daughter was invited to a birthday party the first week of school by a child in another grade, my husband took her, and he said it was by far the wildest thing he had ever experienced as a parent (and we have four children and have been at this for almost 10 years; I have never heard my husband speak negatively about a child's party before). My daughter hung out with one or two kids from other grades at recess - kids who had been at the school for some time - and they shared very negative experiences/impressions of the school with her (I don't remember details and who knows if this means anything, but it fit with all the other negative we experienced).

We began the private school process completely naive and also right after having had my fourth baby. There is a lot that I would do differently if I had it to do over again.

I understand that people on this board are committed to anonymity, but I could care less. We have no plans to send our children to private schools in the area - we have decided to move to Europe, in part because I feel completely done with our school options here - and I have nothing to lose. I wish more people were open and honest about their negative experiences; it would save families a lot of time and money.

I have been writing in between helping sick kids and watching a toddler, so this might be a bit jumbled and I think there are things I meant to say but didn't. I am happy to follow up with more details by email. I have a lot of other, more dramatic feelings about the school that I won't share here. I cannot explain all of the positive feedback online. I have theories, but I won't post them publicly. I think it is entirely possible Grace was a wonderful school at one point in time and also that students in other classes have different experiences from my daughter. It was definitely not the school for us and I would not recommend Grace to anyone.[/quote]

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