Reply to Disturbing Assigned Reading

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DD is a Senior and is currently reading an assigned book that takes place in Afghanistan and is very violent. She told me she is having nightmares but is only half way through. I have read the book and the treatment and brutality towards women is horrifying but I don’t know what to advise my DD to do.[/quote]

If your DD has been diagnosed or if you suspect she’s having diagnosable psychological issues, etc, talk to a professional and disregard my advice.  But if this were my daughter (I have 2 teens), I’d encourage her to read it.  Sheltering near-adults from the brutal, uncomfortable truths of the world doesn’t benefit society or your daughter in the long run.  Ignorance about abhorrent, brutal reality is not bliss.  I’d concurrently offer her tons of opportunities to talk about the book and her feelings and would try to remind her how safe and loved she is at home, though. And I would encourage her to follow that book up with something light (which is what I like to do after I read an emotionally tough book).  [/quote]

+1. I'd also look at what other media she may be consuming that could be causing nightmares.[/quote]

Her nightmares might also be because the novel is surfacing her feelings about how our society brushes off sexual mistreatment of adolescent girls and young women. Why do you think so many teenage girls have depression and anxiety?[/quote]

This.  My DD has read a number of books assigned by school that have significant plot lines that have to do with sexual assault, prostitution or other forms of misogyny.  The Pearl (in 7th grade) is about a concubine.  Kite Runner, Bluest Eye, Persepolis, etc.  All of it resurfaces trauma that girls currently experience - by MS IME girls are experiencing forms of sexual assault and by HS knowing someone who has been raped is sadly common.

It’s compounded by the fact that teachers don’t address these issues and don’t control discussion that goes off the rails (like peers saying that depicted was unimportant or deserved).  My DD literally sat through a discussion in a health class where the boys in the class talked extensively about how the girl, depicted in a video speaking about having been raped while drunk), deserved her rape because she was stupid enough to get drunk.

I’m not saying kids shouldn’t be reading these books, because I think it’s important to know the world and know history, but it made me realize that I had to talk early and often to my DD about racism, sexism, trauma and mental health and her rights.  In the end, that has been for the better. [/quote]

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