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[quote=Anonymous]Ugh, so much to say:

My Dad (now 80s) shared many years ago with my mother that he never remembered a time he wasn’t depressed. Turns out he was Bipolar 2 but no one picked up on it until much later in life.

He tended toward depression 5x more than mania and meds made that 10x until he had a full blown breakdown and was hospitalized for a year when I was in HS. Good times.

Ironically, both my kids and my niece have shades of Bipolar 2 (it can be more of a spectrum than people realize).

My Dad had 3 gears when I was growing up:

Funny and engaging (rare)
Explosive (sometimes)
Silent and brooding (often)

I’m in my 50s now and the biggest impact on me has been recognizing how codependent I tend to be. My mother-an undereducated immigrant—had few options with 3 kids.  So, she stayed with my Dad and I watched her “manage” the house, him, and our childrearing on her own while essentially walking on eggshells. Not the best model.

Thankfully, I married someone far more stable than my Dad and have TONS of therapy so life is good overall, but I still an way more codependent in most aspects of my life than is healthy.  It’s actually exhausting

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