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[quote=Anonymous]I have this issue only it's not my friend, it's her husband. She wouldn't do this and will sometimes even pointedly tell her DH to stop, but he does it ALL THE TIME and it's so irritating. He also asks weirdly pointed questions because he's so competitive and he wants to make sure his kids are "the best" at whatever it is. So he'll interrogate us about exactly what our kids eat or our morning routines or whatever. It's nosy and it's definitely not just curiosity or he's hoping for a good idea. He's checking to make sure their family come out on top.

I honestly don't know what to do. In OP's situation I'd 100% drop the friend -- who needs that. But in my case I like my friend and I know she has some self-awareness about his behavior and makes an effort to curb it, but it's had no impact. Obviously sometimes I just hang out with her, and when we do family hangouts, I mostly avoid him or just demure when he talks/asks about kid and choose not to share things about my own kid so as not to get dragged in. But it still irks me.

Recently she and I had a girls night in at her place, just talking and drinking tea. Lovely night, she's a wonderful friend. Then he came home from some outing and I had a four minute conversation with him as I was leaving and THAT is what wound up sticking with me from the night because he's so grating.

It's such a bummer because she's terrific. Also, his behavior rubs off on their kids and his oldest is competitive and combative. Our kids are still good friends but increasingly my DD will come to me to tell me about something their daughter said to her and while I can field it fine (learning to deal with competitive people is part of life, especially in this area), I worry it will get worse and I don't want to start disliking this kid I've watched grow up and who has been a good friend of my DD's for years.[/quote]

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