Reply to Should one notorious girl in a grade deter us from applying there?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I might talk to the Admissions or HOS even about your concerns. Either they still accept your DD or they don’t. But you’ve been upfront with the administration. [/quote]

OP - do NOT do this. It’s crazy. PP that suggested this - What do you think admissions and HOS are going to do in response to a conversation like this? The only thing that will be accomplished is that there will be a red flag by OP’s name; no HOS wants someone bringing drama to their school. Complaining before you are even admitted? Oh DCUM, don’t ever change![/quote]

I wouldn't say "I hear Larla's a real B and if she's at the school there's no way I'm sending my precious snowflake!" But I would say, "I love x/y/z and about the Briarwood School for Exceptional Girls. My one area of concern is the social dynamics in the Grade x class." and then see how they respond. If they rejected my kid based on that conversation, that would be okay because clearly the school was not a good fit for us.[/quote]

Agree there are ways of asking that would be informative without talking about this specific child.

If you do this, definitely do it in person and make sure to ask someone in authority. Their response could tell you a lot. If they deny it out right and say there have been no issues, and you have concrete evidence that there have been multiple incidence of bullying at school or on a sports team, well then they are lying to you. And if they acknowledge it but pass it off as typical for all schools (it's not) or inevitable (it's not) or indicate that it's the sort of problem that resolves itself (it doesn't), then it would be fair to question whether this is the school for you.

I certainly would not apply to the school without at least asking about the culture and how bullying and cliques are handled, because you have information that it's been a problem in the past. Imagine applying to the school that had a cheating scandal recently and not asking about how the school handles cheating and ethics on campus, for instance. It's a known issue, you need to get it addressed to even consider the school.[/quote]

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