Reply to S/O- Anyone married more than 7 years & happy?

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[quote=Anonymous]Happily married? Yes. Blissful? Sometimes, but not always. We've been married 10 years. We didn't live together before marriage and we got engaged in less than a year. I have no regrets at all.

We hit a rough patch over the holidays -lots of arguing- and it took us a while to sort through things but as painful as it was I do think it made our relationship stronger.

What works for us?

*Be a cheerleader for eachother & give genuine compliments often

*Choose your battles

*Pay attention to what you bring to the table and continue to work on self-awareness and personal change. I started to realize sometimes I could be a real bitch when pissed and it's better to think first and handle things well than be bitchy and then apologize. Changing things in me and being more aware, improved the dynamic.

*I have a life and friends-don't expect my husband to be my everything, but he is my BEST friend and there are some things I only share with him.

*Sex is a great stress relief and it helps us stay happy

* Come to an agreement about in-laws, money, children, religion BEFORE you get married and then revisit these issues as needed rather than making them the elephant in the living room

*A good marriage is more important than always pleasing family and friends. He comes first. It's important to have a network, but don't let anyone undermine your marital relationship (e.g. overdemanding and critical MIL or friend who expects you to be her only emotional support and therefore she feels comfortable calling at 3:00am as needed, etc)[/quote]

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