Reply to Does anyone else not want to live to be very old?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ve had TMJ since my teens. While the likelihood of health problems may increase as you age, there aren’t certainties. A lot of general health is related to lifestyle.  I’ve also had the heartburn problems since my mid 40s  (I think partly due to a hernia and partly due to bad gut health. Eating probiotics helped a lot.)

Of my four grandparents (all of whom I think lived into their 80s), the two who never gave up smoking cigarettes (heavily), had severe health problems and a lot of pain.  The grandfather who had smoked mostly cigars and given them up decades earlier (50s/early 60s?), had a heart attack when he was planting trees in his yard.

My parents are in their 70s. My mom had a terrible stroke in 2021 and it was basically a miracle she survived. While she had a terrible year, through the grace of God, the support of my father, and incredible hard work (she’s a formidable woman), she’s pretty much made a full recovery (just a slight tremor in one hand when she gets tired). She travels, drives herself around town, plays the piano, visits friends, crafts, walks over a mile a day, and does what she wants to do.  I’m pretty sure she’s in better shape than I am at 51.

My father is slowing down some, but still leads a full life. He can no longer lift heavy things, and probably has to hire people for home/yard maintenance and repair he would have done previously. I don’t think he misses mowing the yard, and considering his handyman skills, the house is probably better off in tge hands of a professional. Meanwhile, last November, he drove my mom 900 miles for a holiday in Vegas and then 900 miles back home.

My ex-father-in-law is in his 80s. I think he’s slowing down a little now, but until recently, he was cycling (a lot) daily and would travel around the world scuba diving.

My ex-mother-in-law, unfortunately passed away several years ago in her 70s. She had been leading an active lifestyle, including playing tennis, being an avid gardener, and visiting us from Georgia every year.

I think you can have a high quality of life in your 80s. While there are, of course, a myriad of interacting variables, I think if you avoid smoking, minimize alcohol consumption, and have daily exercise (this is where I fall short) to maintain bone density, muscle tone, and cardiovascular health, your chances of having “golden” years rise significantly. [/quote]

My parents did all those "right" things and like you, they loved to blame anyone who declined poorly until they started rapidly declining.

Also, in my family there is tremendous denial of reality. They brag about being "sharp as a tack" and a good convo with that person and you realize the person is totally declining. They make up excuses about grandpa getting lost driving home from the store or grandma peeing in the laundry room because she thought it was the bathroom in a home she lived in for decades. It's like Facebook. The couple bragging about being madly in love are getting divorced. In my family, bragging about how well elders are aging usually means Dementia has already hit and it's in the elephant in the room. If you have the nerve to see the elephant, everyone gaslights you.[/quote]

I am the PP you are quoting and I was neither blaming nor bragging.  I was simply trying to point out that some people can and do live full lives even when they’re elderly. Hitting 70 or 80 doesn’t automatically doom everyone to health problems, nor does youth exempt you. I specifically said there are “a myriad of interacting variables”.  Moreover, I identified myself as having some of those health problems, myself, even as a teenager.  My whole point, that I apparently didn’t communicate effectively, is that there are no guarantees at any age (good or bad), and that OP might have some wonderful years ahead of them, even as they age.

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