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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

OP are you a guy ?  I’m surprised a woman would write a post like this [/quote]

Yes, friend from college. Our children are friends, too. I know her ex by extension of her, but she and I have the relationship (which has never been intimate and I am happily married).[/quote]

DP.  Never crossed my mind you might have more-than-friends interest in her, it sounded more like you’re hot for him. [/quote]

Nope, not gay. Weird it came across that way.

I guess I come across more from the perspective of why are you surprised? Did you just assume men are idiots when it comes to these things? We aren’t.

I mean, I did tell her something like that at one point but she was pretty dug in on her narrative about him not doing enough around the house, etc.[/quote]

Latent gender biases can affect your perceptions.  If you have a mom and a dad putting in equal effort at home, he is more likely to be praised for being so involved even though he never does the dishes, while she is more likely to be labeled as lazy because she never does the dishes. Unless you were living in their home, you know very little about their contributions at home. [/quote]

Yes, I said that in my first post. I also think the truth lies somewhere in between and that probably wasn’t worth divorcing over, assuming that was the real problem. In any case, it seems like *he* wasn’t the source of her unhappiness as she continues to be unhappy, perhaps moreso. I wish I could help her find happiness. Because from where I sit, he seems to be perfectly happy and functional while my friend is just a mess. [/quote]

DP.  I would suggest you stop calling yourself her friend, because you clearly are no friend given how you look down on her.[/quote]

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