Reply to Parent in Hospice Says Death is Imminent Every Few Days

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You won’t regret the time you spent with her once she’s gone. I lost both my parents last year. On the day my mom died the hospital told us we had to leave at 5:00 pm. I was “obedient” and left and about an hour later the hospital called to say she was dying. By the time I got back to the hospital she was unconscious and barely breathing and died about a minute after I got to her side. I regret so much that I wasn’t there with her in her last hour. It’s not exactly the equivalent but you won’t have a chance to go back and be with her once she’s gone. If I were you I’d go see her every time she asks you to, even if it’s a huge effort, you will feel better about it once she is gone. I have so many regrets OP and wish I could go back in time and have been with my mom when it mattered the most.[/quote]

I agree with you and did the same for both my parents as I felt every moment was precious. But some people just cannot handle the dying process and I think OP may be one of those. It's not a judgment it's just the way it is.

One of our siblings was this way and would find any excuse to be absent because they simply could not handle it. In order to mentally justify it she would say that the dying parent yelled at her, or argued with her, or any other reason she could come up with. We understood it was because she was overwhelmed and could not handle the heartache.  [/quote]

^Wanted to add that once we told this sibling it was OK to not be there, there was notably less tension and anxiety for everyone. [/quote]

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