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[quote=Anonymous]Likely your dad dying when you were young is contributing to this.

However women and mothers are not the good people and men and fathers the bad people. We can't assume that women have good intentions or motivations and men bad ones. Women can be all the bad things that men are and they don't always make the right choices or decisions. Men and women also experience all the contexts and factors that shape the decisions they make. Humans are complex.

My ex SIL was not a good mother at all but the guilt over societal expectations that she was supposed to be and the fact that society and the courts saw her as better parent solely due to her female sex meant a horrible childhood for my nieces. After ten years of court battles my brother finally got sole custody. Over time he was actually able to get them to reestablish a relationship with their mother but they will be forever scarred and damaged and in therapy for the ten years she had them, when they had a healthy and loving parent who desperately wanted them and was fighting to get them. She would have been a much better non custodial parent and the kids and her would have had much better relationships and there would have been so much less trauma if society accepted that fathers can be great parents and not all mothers are.

Becoming an adult makes you look differently at both parents. In some cases you understand more why they did what they did and in other cases, you see more where they didn't do the right things or where they weren't in the right.  If / when you become a parent, there is another refreshing of your view and perspective of the choices and decisions that each parent made.[/quote]

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