Reply to How to accept my SN child fully

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just talking about things matter of fact like they are normal (and they are to me) really helped me. Speaking the words and getting comfortable with talking about our lives. It was no easy thing because some of it felt so embarrassing- like having to call the police on your own child who is violent or calling off work because your kid had to be hospitalized again after another suicide attempt. [/quote]

I agree with this post a lot. I am the poster whose kid has profound ID. I have no problem being like “oh, today my kid ate her poop and I had to bathe her again” or “oh, she started her period and I’ve got to get her on birth control to stop it, because I’m not dealing with a period in a diaper.” I am just very matter of fact about exactly what our life looks like. I’m not embarrassed by any of this.

I also agree with the person that says you have to give up a little bit of hope. You have to let go of expectations.

I also totally understand the OP follow up of NOTHING IS EASY. Our life is very much like this. Nothing is easy. But, we have made it ok and are happy. One of the things we have done is outsourced care. We have to get a break from it. So, I would suggest OP consider this if you can afford it.[/quote]

This is OP. When you talk about your life, does anyone get it? I’m crying as I type this because part of what’s hard for me is that no one in my life understands what my life is like. I know I need to connect with other families like ours, but I have found that hard. (I’m a single mom with a behaviorally challenging SN child. When I meet a mom at OT, she has a partner and a lot more financial resources than me, so her life looks really different than mine. When I meet a mom at school with a special needs child, her child doesn’t have behaviors, so she’s mad that mine gets services so easily and is sometimes disruptive to the classroom and to her child.) My friends don’t get it at all, even if they try to. I feel lonely. Or crazy. I don’t even think my therapist really gets it.[/quote]

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