Reply to Is moving an elderly parent into a care facility a form of 'betrayal'?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Maybe I’m missing something - but if you have unlimited funds for caregivers, can’t you always stay in your home? If she gets worse, can’t you just hire more staff at home?

If you can envision a scenario where her staying home is no longer viable, then THATS what you say. “Oh, of course, we don’t want to put her in a home either. But if X, Y, and Z happen, I don’t think it’ll be viable for her to stay home. So we’re preparing incase that happens. Do you disagree?” And see what they say. Maybe they have some creative ideas for ways they’d be able to keep her home. [/quote]

Not OP, but been there. Awful. Her are the drawbacks

1.) Caregivers no-show. Then what? The case manager will tell you they have backup. The backup was me getting emergency calls and being expected to be there. I developed blood pressure issues.
2.) Caregiver stealing during night shift.
3.) Parent making accusations and even with cameras you can't catch anything. Brain has deteriorated so much can't trust parent's account.
4.) Total isolation. People stop visiting. At least at a facility you are around multiple people and some try to engage with you. With an aide all day there is only so much engagement and you may think you will be there often, but life happens and you have to prioritize.
5.) Impossible to fully elder proof the house in many cases.
6.) Caregivers quit a lot. The job sucks.[/quote]

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