Reply to Schadenfreude with my MIL

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Schadenfreude with my MIL"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, am I right in suspecting that they said things like:
-It was God’s will
-God wanted the baby home with Him

Or something else spiritual?

I’m not defending that, at all, it’s just such a rote thing for older people who are religious to say. They may have experienced their family saying such things their entire lives.

I’m sorry for your pain, and for their insensitive reaction to your loss. I can hear the hurt in your post, and the anger. I’m not being glib when I say that I hope you are talking to a good therapist or grief counselor. I wish you well and I wish I could give you a hug.

And to the rest of you: OP has not done or said anything inappropriate. She is voicing here her pain and anger and her instinct to hurt them the way they hurt her, which she has not acted upon. Thoughts and impulses are not crimes. OP is responsible for her words and actions, not her thoughts. Don’t be such massive hypocrites—we have ALL had dark and immature and unproductive *thoughts.*[/quote]

Nope it wasn't religious, I redirected and corrected my MIL the first time she said it, the second time she said it I explained what the doctors had said was not what she was saying and the 3rd time both her and FIL doubled down on blaming me.

My husband confronted them both and they again double downed that I had "attacked" them. Which there were witnesses to the conversation that confirmed that absolutely did not happen.

It's not a terminal diagnosis and I am absolutely won't say to them what they said to me. I don't say anything to them and I now make 0 effort to see them. My husband is free to do as he wishes and I don't interfere with how he chooses to interact with them.[/quote]

OP, they sound AWFUL. I am so sorry.

Who are the witnesses to their claims that you attacked them? if they are family members also, please protect your peace and keep in mind that those people are probably far more likely to ignore the behavior because it was not directed at them, however wrong and hurtful MIL and FIL were to you. So, you may need to be careful there. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics