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[quote=Anonymous]I would try to assume MIL is just clueless and not mean spirited.  I would simply ask her "XXX, teenager is sensitive about her appearance.  You know how awkward the teenage years could be.  I've taken her to the dermatologist. Can you please refrain from making comments about her appearance" and then move on.  If she continues, then get more firm.  Many people are suggesting starting with more aggressive comments, but honestly it will probably only serve to make your dd uncomfortable and just make it more obvious. I would try to assume that she's well intentioned and in her generation it was more acceptable to do so.  That doesn't mean she still can, but try to point it out and see if she changes it first. You said dd needed an intervention for the acne so clearly you had to speak up because it was bad enough.  It's somewhat hypocritical to say "leave her be we love her as is!" and then have an intervention where you also commented on changing her appearance.  Grandma may also think she's being helpful and maternal but it's stepped over your boundary. Gently reinforce those boundaries and see if you can do it with minimal waves. Teenagers typically don't like more attention drawn to things like this, at least i didn't.  Some posters say they would have wanted to hear their parent loudly shut it down. I wouldn't have.  I would have wanted them to quietly handle it without me hearing a bigger fuss made. Hugs to you on both the acne and the annoying MIL and the DH who won't speak up....BTDT on all.[/quote]

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