Reply to Spin Off - Grieving the spouse I lost to mental illness

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your DH and your kids with mental issues could all be exposed to the same environmental factors. I'm a problem solver, but if I were in your shoes I would be researching all possibilities -- mold, lyme disease, contaminants in the water pipes like lead, chronic strep, whether symptoms began after a move, etc.[/quote]

NP.  I know this response tried to come from a good place but it’s so unhelpful.

Some problems cannot be solved.

I get it, OP.  My parents are both mentally ill.  I allow myself to grieve and feel bad for never having a real family.  It’s the reality, and it hurts, and you acknowledge it and then you can move on.[/quote]

True, some problems cannot be solved - but some problems can. My defiant explosively rage-y DC with paralyzing OCD and anxiety improved hugely - now nearly back to normal and still improving - after we learned our house had multiple mold issues and moved. I used to be just as skeptical about mold, Lyme, etc., but indeed, sometimes there is an environmental or other cause that, if treated, can make a real difference in the person’s mental health.

OP, sending you love and my hope for a better future for you and yours.[/quote]

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