Reply to I feel like I have forced myself to a crossroads

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "I feel like I have forced myself to a crossroads"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just set the relationship aside. Don't lock the door, just close it. Cutting off your mother is a huge deal. The posters who say they aren't losing anything by cutting off their mother are kidding themselves. The loss is profound. You are only giving yourself another trauma to deal with by cutting off your mom.

Relationships are like ladders -- you don't throw them away when you're done using them, you lean them against the wall for later.[/quote]

That trauma and loss happened a long time ago. I stay to prevent her trauma not my own[/quote]

You don't know that. Absolute loss of the relationships is way more extreme than you acceptance that your mom is not a fantasy mom. It is a profound loss. You'd be better off learning how to handle your own emotions and not let her control them.[/quote]

Sorry for the typos:
You don't know that. Absolute loss of the relationship is way more extreme than your acceptance that your mom is not a fantasy mom. It is a profound loss. You'd be better off learning how to handle your own emotions and not let her control them.[/quote]

With all due respect you don’t know me. And you don’t know her. I assume you’re not speaking from the vantage point of a victim of this type of relationship[/quote]

Why in the world would I post that if I didn't speak from experience???[/quote]

The point is that everyone's experience is different.[/quote]

Yes and most people on these threads are just giving advice out of the asses. "Cut her off -- you'll feel so much better!" I used to feel that way. "Best thing I ever did -- wish I had done it sooner." Wait a few years. See how you feel in 5, 10, 15, 20 years. It doesn't get better, it gets worse.[/quote]

If you cutoff due to abusive behavior and you tried to make the relationship healthier and you got therapy and nothing seemed to help, then I am concerned things got worse for you once you finally released yourself from the toxicity. I would strongly suggest you get help because it sounds like you are at risk for abusive romantic relationships and friendships as well if you struggle with a decision to say I cannot tolerate one more second of being a verbal punching bag.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics