Reply to Allowance for College Students

Forum Index » College and University Discussion

Reply to "Allowance for College Students"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have 2 in college and we pay tutition, room and board - although 50% of their tuition is covevered by scholarships.  They each get $50 a week from us, plus I believe that the grandparents kick in "off the books."  They just do not tell us.

While I agree generally about teaching responsibilites, you have to know your kid.  We give DD's money because they both will work like mules if we allowed them to.  These are both kids who have held jobs since they were 15 and DD1 worked two jobs this past summer.  The first two years, wanted them to focus on academics and college life and not worry about trying to make money.   [/quote]Since when was hard work something to be minimized?[/quote]

PP you are quoting. Not minimizing hard work at all.  But if I am sending them to college and paying a big part of the freight, I want that hard work focused in the books - not at some part time job at Quiznos.  That is what the summer is for.  Once we get to junior year and there is a good track record with grades, then we would allow it.  As a freshman, no way!  I have seen too many first year kids struggle with academics trying to juggle an off campus job.

Full disclsoure:  I worked a full time job my last two years of college and I would not want that for my kids.  [/quote]

I have put 2 kids through college as well, and from the beginning of high school we made it very clear: They could go to college if they wanted (both me and DH did), but we were not going to push them or help them do that. We did help them pay, with the cost of college right now and when we did it wouldn't be reasonable to make them pay all on their own, but only for half of the college cost. If they wanted to go to college, it was mostly their responsibility to get there and do the work. We could afford to pay their way through college, but we knew that they needed to take up the responsibility to go out there and manage for them self, not go batshit insane, drink, party, and drug every night. Because they were paying for their own food, housing, and part of their education they respected it, and payed more attention to it.

During their freshman year, we helped out a bit more, by paying for part of their housing and for their college meal plan, but once we fealt that they had settled in, we stopped doing this. They came out of college as very attractive to those hiring due to the fact that they had experience over all four years of college, had a great work ethic, and could go into an interview room without a nice little speech written my Mommy and Daddy talking about how amazing their son/daughter was.

Did my son and daughter never have rough patches? Of course not, it was a lot of work, and they slipped up once and a while, my DS at one point ended up without enough money to pay for housing for one year. What did he do? He came back home and worked his ass off for a year, taking a break from university. On the other hand, they almost always had respectable grades, gained friends, both from their university and from their work/the community, and are now either employed or paying their own way through graduate studies.

Why is it better to  pay for a child's college education? Too often you see kids who are just not prepared for college go off on a full ride from their parents to college. They get money thrown at them left and right.[/quote]

The PP here.  I understand where you are coming from - as I said, my folks made me work full time my last 2 years (NOT my first year on campus).  I also said that you have to know your kids.  My kids are not partiers and have ALWAYS showed a lot of responsibility and taken their education seriously. And they both worked during high school and summers during college.  I do not throw money at them and they understand that grades are paramount.  If they do not get the grades, then we will not be paying anymore.  My kids would never accuse me of being soft and they both want to work.   At the same time, I do not want to put obstacles in the way of their success their first year.  This was their first year away from home and totally on their own.  As their parents, we determined what they could handle this year and decided accordingly. As they demonstrate that they can handle the load, then we will look at other things.  I look at it this way.  I am not "paying" for these kids to go to college.  I am investing in their education and their futures and I want a maximum return on my investment.  Sorry, I just do not believe in sending a kid of to college on my dime and saying "figure it out" from day one.  Day 500 - maybe.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics