Reply to what to do if your significant other can't or won't do your love language?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I also don't think you're a good fit.

I think you should look into your feelings about how you need words of affirmation. What you're saying is a bit different than what I've read words of affirmation to be. I too am words of affirmation (plus acts of service), but to me that is someone recognizing and thanking me for things that I've done. I mean this kindly, but yours sounds like low self esteem or a coping mechanism. Have you explored that? Adults don't need other people to nonstop verbalize how someone feels about them- and it's only been 8 months.

Things you said: 
-share his feelings about me
-He has said he adores me and cares about me after I've brought it up
-who can't or won't say how they feel about me
[/quote]

OP: yes, good points and that's why I'm wondering if the problem is with me. I do want him to share his feelings about me, otherwise I feel kind of empty and like our relationship is superficial. I want there to be emotional intimacy, and I'm not sure if the depth of feelings is there. I realize it's been 8 months, but I feel like we've spent a lot of time together. I would like to hear that he cares about me and I mean something to him once a week- is that realistic?[/quote]

Once a week?  Yeah, that's not going to last in most relationships.

I also think you're equating "saying he loves me" with "emotional intimacy," when intimacy means a lot more than that.  Intimacy is about sharing your hopes and fears, your worries, your joy.  Do you really not think he cares about you?  Does he really not demonstrate that you matter to him in any way?  [/quote]

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