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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]At first I thought you were going to describe my situation, emotionally stunted parents who never talked or socialized. It took leaving for college to feel normal and like my real self. I now know they are on the spectrum.

Anyhow, emotional outbursts as you describe are different, and possibly more manageable thought perhaps not after decades of that ingrained behavior. [/quote]

How do you and your children deal with them today?[/quote]

In general I prioritize socializing, activities, holiday traditions, talking at dinner, etc. with the children. All normal middle class stuff that I never got to do.

With them things continue to be very check the box. They have grandchildren, they get the societal sense that they should see them once a year, they book the cheapest flights and times they can find, come stay with us for a week or two….. yet having a conversation about anything is like pulling teeth. They just cannot relate to people or what’s going in. My spouse usually has to repeat what his job is for the 100th time. It’s best to ask them what book they’re reading or news they read online. The kids are older now, 8 and 10 and think something is off.

We visit once a year and tack on a side vacation now that the kids are older. They are difficult to travel with - new places, they want to cook or bring their own food or avoid paying for anything. They have good money and savings, just don’t spend it. My brother has inherited the same issues and lives at home in his early 40s so the money may actually go all to him as he has trouble holding down a job or partner. [/quote]

I am the poster who asked, and thank you for responding.  One of my parents on the spectrum, though both of your parents sound way more social than mine.  It's that bad. :(  I'm kind of struggling on how to manage my relationship with them now as they have gotten so much older and my children and teenagers.[/quote]

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