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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, you sound incredibly supportive and he's fortunate. Please don't forget that YOU are a person in this family too, with your needs. At the risk of sounding cold (but it's easy for me to do since I'm a stranger) but I think you might want to start telling him he needs to commit to getting a handle on his issues rather than burdening you with them and seeking permission to do things he knows aren't in his or his family's best interest, because your support tank is running dry and your resentment tank is starting to fill. And you mention that you have kids?! Kids pick up on more than we think. Have you checked in with them about their joyless, do nothing father? Separation might be best for everyone involved. [/quote]

I fully agree with this. I am 60 and have lived with an ADHD spouse for 26 years. He smoked weed for years to ‘fix’ the problem. It didn’t. He’s been using extreme exercise which he thinks works, but it doesn’t. Covid forced him to work at home and it’s been a bit of a nightmare - every time I have to say something to him, I run the risk of being told to ‘shut up because I’m ruining his concentration’, etc. Well, then give me the unilateral power to make household decisions and don’t expect to be consulted. The kids are grown and right now I’m planning two months way with family up north with the dog for some R&R. What he doesn’t know is I might not decide to come home. [/quote]

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