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Elementary School-Aged Kids
Reply to "8 yr old says she hates herself when frustrated"
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[quote=Anonymous]You wrote: "The thing that doesn't make sense is that she doesn't want to take her time and make her work "perfect," she just doesn't want anyone to tell her that she has done something wrong or something needs to be different. And even if I don't tell her it needs a change, but she thinks she can't do it right, then she gets upset." My daughter does this as well. It makes sense, actually; the perfectionist can feel such discomfort and anxiety while doing something she thinks she can't do perfectly that the response is to get out of the scary situation asap (thus, rushing through the work to regain some sense of equilibrium again). Some reading on the topic of both anxiety and perfectionism in kids may help illuminate quite a bit of your daughter's initially mystifying behavior. So great that you are reaching out to understand your daughter. I'm sure it will be effort well repaid in the relationship longterm.[/quote]
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