Reply to Is it weird to ask to wear protection?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Absolutely use protection! You're not an outlier.

I remember asking a guy to use protection (we weren't serious but had been hooking up on occasion) years before marriage. [b]He used to secretly take the condom off midway through. I was horrified.[/b] When I called him out on it, he told me it was no big deal bc I gave blood regularly so he knew that I was "safe". Guys can be gross and manipulative. I got a STD test shortly thereafter which was thankfully negative.

Stay safe, OP.[/quote]

NP. I'm so sorry that happened to you -- sounds like more than once, too.

This is called "stealthing" and today the attitude toward it is increasingly that it's not only not OK, it's actually criminal. Which it should be.

California made it a civil offense last year. Hoping it becomes a criminal one everywhere someday because it's a profound, grave violation of trust, with potential life-long consequences for the woman like pregnancy or disease (and I don't care if the man picks up something -- he's the one who took off the damn condom.) It has been compared to a kind of rape, because once the condom is removed, the woman is, even if she doesn't yet realize it, participating in  a sex act to which she did [i]not[/i] consent. The men who do this are beyond lowlifes.

https://www.npr.org/2021/10/07/1040160313/california-stealthing-nonconsensual-condom-removal[/quote]

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