Reply to How do you not yell at your child?

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Reply to "How do you not yell at your child?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm the poster you quoted above, and my relationship with my mother is good now, but I will never forget how she acted when my brother and I were kids.  I actually went to therapy to deal with some of it, because not only was she a huge yeller, when she was really mad she would engage in what I now know is verbal abuse.  She would find those one or two things about you that she knew would punch you right in the gut, and she'd get right on that point and make sure she hammered it until you really felt low.

I have to say, there were areas in which she was an awesome mom, when she wasn't yelling.  My memories overall are good, for me they outweigh the bad.  I guess I was always able to put things in perspective ... my parents loved us, we were reasonably well-off and didn't really want for anything, and we weren't being beaten or anything like that.  Otherwise known as "shit happens."  My brother, on the other hand, has not and will not forgive her, ever.

OP, I wish I could give you better advice on how to stop your yelling, but really, it's just sheer willpower on my part.  When I feel like I want to yell, I remind myself of what I told you before ... that these little creatures don't know how to act and it's my job to teach them.  However, I have definitely been known to get down on my 3 year old son's level and tell him exactly what I am thinking when he does something that he KNOWS he is not supposed to be doing.

Remember though, my kids are still little.  I'm hoping I'll be able to maintain this Zen approach to yelling when they are older.  [/quote]

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