Reply to My “needing to be liked” problem

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Similar story, OP, and I also tried to address it for years through talk therapy, will power, and self help. Some of these efforts helped a little at the margins, but nothing truly moved the needle.

It wasn't until I hit menopause and went on antidepressants-antianxiety meds to help with those symptoms that I really was able to get a handle on my feelings of inadequacy, people pleasing, etc. It's funny because all I really wanted was some relief from hot flashes, but the true benefits have all been to my mental health. I had no idea how much anxiety I had learned to live with, or how living with a high level of anxiety sets you up to over-react to (and obsessively try to neutralize) perceived threats - especially those that recreate or remind you of past trauma. Now, with that baseline level of anxiety under control, I am finally able to "stop caring" as some pps have suggested.

It has been a revelation. My only regret is that I didn't try meds sooner. So, my advice is that if you've tried talk therapy and self-help and all the things, and after years of these efforts you're still not at a place where you can control it (as well as understand it), is to find a doctor who can help you think through your medication options.[/quote]

Thank you for describing your experience!  Can you tell it bit more?  What meds?  What dosage?  Any side effects?  What were your overreactions?  I am not trying to pry - I have thought that I might need meds but my therapist has always said I don't.[/quote]

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