Reply to As parents, how should I respond if there are IEP meeti comments that DC is rude and disrespectful?

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Reply to "As parents, how should I respond if there are IEP meeti comments that DC is rude and disrespectful? "

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[quote=Anonymous]Did they actually use those words? I switched out of the schools this year but when I was in IEP meetings, telling a parent that their child with ASD was "rude" and "disrespectful" was not something we would have done, and a staff member coming in and saying that would have gotten the stinkeye. It's unnecessarily judgmental and confrontational and it's equally unproductive because it is well-known that social difficulties that may come off as "rude" or "disrespectful" are part and parcel of ASD and just telling the kid that does nothing to help them know what they did that came off that way, or learn a different behavior. Calling them "rude" implies that if you just tell them off, they'll fix it, and that's not what happens. If I heard that in a meeting I would question the colleague's experience. Is it stemming from rigidity? Inability to read non-verbal cues or alter the register of a message depending on the listener? "Rude" is a useless word.

I might let it go this time but push back next time if they start saying things like that again. It's unhelpful at the minimum. I'm sorry you felt like they were attacking your child; I think anyone would have felt that way, which is why they should have phrased it more thoughtfully and constructively.[/quote]

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