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[quote=Anonymous]My dad's mom died when I was a junior in high school. All my grandparents were "old" grandparents because my parents were both the youngest of very large families, so my image of Grandma A was her lace up shoes and how when I had to sleep with her as a kid during visits at times there was all this  unlacing of corsets and unbraiding her hair (yes, she was old), and the occasional 50 cent piece she would give us from her purse. And her strong ties to her Lutheran church.

It wasn't until I was 60 (not many years ago) that I learned that she met my grandfather through a newspaper ad (he wanted a wife) and that before that she had moved out west, filed a homestead claim, and planned to marry a farmer who had files an adjacent homestead claim (plus he was Catholic with French ancestry rather than Scandinavian) but was murdered and his horse stolen on a journey. (I was able to locate her original claim through some USDA archive site,it is now at the bottom of a reservoir). An amazing story I wished I'd known earlier. Also, the never married uncle who used to play games with us and always had treats turned out to have a past history of mental illness leading to episodes of violence resulting in the sheriff coming to the house form time to time. Never mentioned, but it was all in the diary of an unmarried aunt who had died and my mom corroborated it. Didn't change my child hood memories of my uncle although I now realize there was more to the picture. 
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