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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here's the deal. My husband could do something that would make me stop loving him. My kids couldn't. [/quote]

This is true, and true for my DH as well, and yet I think my DH would be just like OP's DH. I'm not sure what I would say if pressed. I love my DH. SO much. It is a different love than what I have for my kids in the way PP describes. The love I have for them is a constant. The intensity is basically constant. They are a part of my physical being in a way that is not changeable.

My DH is less permanent, I know that he could die and I might even love someone else. He could cheat on me and maybe we would break up. But just because it is not permanent, doesn't mean it is less intense. Something about the impermanence kind of adds to the intensity in some ways. We choose each other. And I think our very intense love for one another is a good thing for my kids.

I don't think anyone wins when you 'compare' love. It is different. I certainly don't love my friends 'as much' as my kids or DH, but I also think living a life without my friends would have been a sad and lonely life! Their contribution to my overall network of relationships is so important! The same for my aunts and uncles, and siblings and parents. All different, some more permanent than others, all important. What is gained by ranking them?

I think what is important is that my kids know in their souls that both DH and I love them fervently and will until the day we die. That is true, and there is almost no benefit in trying to parse out quantities of an intangible emotion. I try to focus more, and try to make them focus more, on how incredibly fortunate we are to have so many people to love and who love us. [/quote]

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