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[quote=Anonymous]Honestly, I don't really believe you that a 12 year old would refuse a trip to Paris.  You seem *very* invested in your ideas about "equality".  And I agree that taking FOUR children on an international trip is just too much to ask of people in their late 60s.  And if you have been trying to keep your parents from coming over when your stepchildren are there, is it any wonder they don't have much of a bond?

It seems like you are not respecting your husband's decision here.  He prefers to not make a big deal of this, and he's the step-children's parent so you should defer to him.

You need to understand that not everyone sees divorce and remarriage as positively as you do.  Not everyone wants to jump aboard the Big Happy Family Bus just to keep you happy when they're not actually feeling it.  It's a generational difference but it's also one of temperament and philosophy.  Everyone knows perfectly well you could divorce your DH and that would be the end of this grandparent "relationship".  Don't kid yourself that this isn't the underlying truth.

I'm a stepchild myself and would never, ever, ever want to vacation with my step-grandparents or have my stepmother all wound up about making me spend time with her family or treating me whatever she's decided is "equal".   Sometimes it's best to relax a little bit.  [/quote]

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