Reply to House Envy of a friend

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, not everyone with nice houses have miserable lives.

I know plenty of people with great houses fit for a high end magazine, seemingly perfect.  They have great taste!  They were raised in a family/area that had nice things and knew how to take care of them. They also have great marriages and great children.  They take great vacations and have a great beach house.

But I realize all of this takes an unbelievable amount of work.  They spent more time working on themselves than minding what others have or what they think others have.  I hope they live long and enjoy it, because they are truly great people.  They don't pay for everyones dinner, but they would be there if anyone truly needed it.  They don't spend time with people who wallow in their own self pity and entitlement.  They spend time with people who are constantly bettering themselves, and therefor have an incredible and very healthy outlook.

I suppose you need to surround yourself with people more like you in order to be happy.  But what is that definition to you?  Probably not someone who tells you 
"maybe its you" (see PP); but rather, someone who is supportive and knows how to be a friend (within reason).  I say within reason because no friend can undo the damage mommy and daddy did, so to speak.

It seems you really need to keep things in perspective and be thankful for why you do have, things that money can not buy.  Do you have healthy children/parents/family/spouse?  Your own health?  What if you died tomorrow?  Do you want people to remember you as the person who could not get over what the next guy had and spent her time worrying about it and acting out?

I say this because somehow, I am certain your friend knows you resent what she has, or what you think she has.  This is no way to keep the type of friends you seem to be looking for.  Would you prefer people who are jealous like you?  Misery loves company. Instead of truly being able to be happy for others, they look for fault.  How on earth would that make anyone happy?  It does not.  It manifests and comes out at every opportunity.  Have you *seen* the way some grown adults act?!?!

I have passed up on many "friendships" where people can't get over their own screamingly obvious jealousy and bitterness - which of course, they would never admit.

I wish you peace OP.  Really.

Do you know the secret to having nice things?  Being raised around nice things, knowing and appreciating what you have, and actually working hard and investing blood, sweat, tears and your own (no one else's) money to get from point A to point B.  Some people here are so very clueless.  They really sound as if they believe it is "luck" or something that falls from the sky.  I thought people here were supposed to be smart, but all I have seen is bitter.

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