Reply to Retrospective advice for a middle schooler

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[quote=Anonymous]The absolute best thing you can do for your kid in middle school is to let them take complete ownership of their grades and homework, even if that means Bs or Cs. Talk to them about it, sure and get them help if they need it, but don't keep checking their homework portal to see if they've turned things in, etc. Middle school is where they learn to manage their work by trial and error. Grades don't really matter. Also teach them to talk to the teacher directly if they have an issue (ie, thought something was turned in, but they got a zero for it.) This is a vital life skill, and middle school is the best place to start using it. Don't step in, even if you're sure the teacher is wrong. Learning that sometimes they have to deal with fallible humans is good for them too. 
   I'm pleased we managed to do this with ours and it has paid off for all of us now that they're in high school. Instead of giving them a hard time for lower than expected grades in middle school, we were supportive and asked what they need and what they can do about it. Most kids around here will already feel less-than for lower grades. They feel the pressure to get As. They don't need their parents piling on. 
    Make sure they're getting exercise outside every day. Have them join at least one outside activity, maybe a couple. (sports, scouts, chorus etc) Social dynamics in middle school can get f'd up, and it's good for kids to have a completely separate social setting as a counter-balance. [/quote]

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