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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Covert narcissism is not a real psychological term. It is like a psychological internet conspiracy for people who can’t make sense of their relationships. The only people who go down these internet narcissism rabbit holes are usually mentally I’ll themselves. Labeling your spouse a covert narcissist doesn’t serve you. You need to do what everyone else does - get a real therapist to work in your relationship with you and decide next steps. And please please please don’t spend the rest of your life complaining to your children about how their dad is a “covert narcissist.” In case you can’t tell, my mother was just like you!!!!![/quote]

You sound very angry. Very, very angry.. has someone called you a covert narcissist? Because it seems like a real nerve was hit. Labeling people “mentally ill” based off your own personal judgments isn’t really something that’s helpful or ethical. Also, terms like “covert narcissist” have helped many women leave incredibly abusive relationships because they were able to identify what was happening to them. If women leaving abusers makes you angry, then i don’t really know what to tell you.[/quote]

Yes, I am very angry, because my mom was sucked into all this internet narcissism nonsense. First, she decided my dad was a narcissist. Then she decided his parents were narcissists. Then she decided my sister and I were narcissists. Then she decided her two brothers were narcissists. None of us are actually narcissists and do not match the criteria for NPD, so how convenient that the internet provided her with a menu of different kinds of narcissists. Who is the common denominator in all these failed relationships? My mom! She can’t accept that she has actual issues to work through and problems relating to others, so it became paramount for her to label and dismiss everyone in her life, and the thriving internet community of narcissism-obsessive helped her do it. It’s not unlike watching someone descend into internet conspiracy theories. It’s really upsetting and has affected me intensely.[/quote]

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