Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Money and Finances
Reply to "Wedding gift "
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thank you all for your answers. My DH and his friend are both attorneys, DH is high up in-house and his friend built his own practice.[/quote] Money is pointless here. Seems like both your DH and his friend have plenty of money. No one is going to notice $300 - $400, in other words, it's not a meaningful gift. Frankly, I'd feel a bit offended, not at the sum involved but the laziness. Instead of $400 cash, give a $400 bottle of wine. Or something ephemeral and luxurious. Or see if you can get a very nice dinner fully paid for (something that'd normally cost $400 for two people, including wine pairing). Something that is a bit more thoughtful then gee, another check or envelope of cash. If someone gave me a check or cash for that amount, it'd probably sit around for months before being deposited given I rarely go to the bank in person nor use cash to pay for things. [/quote] What is “plenty of money”? OP here. While we are ok, we don’t have “plenty of money” and I never tried $400 bottle of wine. Both my DH and his friend from lower middle class background and both are solid middle class. He gave us $300 for our wedding 10 years ago and we were very happy about the money. We used all the cash gifts to pay for a wonderful honeymoon in Hawaii. Also his parents are both dead and he is paying for a wedding. His bride is of a lower income. I don’t know what world this forum lives in to consider attorneys some spoiled brats. We are not like that.[/quote] NO...you got it all wrong OP. Attorneys just don't have a heart. You have the $$ but no heart to gift it to someone who in my opinion represents a close relationship. Certainly $300 or even $3K would not make a dent, long term in your pocket. It's all about the heart and you both are lacking. Sorry. You asked for it. [/quote] Not OP but you need to chill out. Giving cash often means the person is practical and not “lacking heart.” I think many people who insist on giving an actual gift rather than cash do so for narcissistic reasons. You give an actual gift for reasons that have to do with you — you want the receiver to think of you every time they use the gift or to associate you with some memorable experience. You want to be acknowledged as some kind of clever gift giver who really understands the desires of the recipient. You expect to be fawned over. More often than not, gifts wind up returned, thrown out, or passed along in a buy nothing group. It is an incredible waste and often very frustrating to the recipient. Most of us do not want more crap we didn’t choose for ourselves. I’d absolutely hate receiving a $400 case of wine. Blind taste tests conducted on so called wine experts who even they cannot tell what’s an expensive versus cheap wine. I’d just roll my eyes at such a gift. A gift certificate for a nice dinner out — ok, fine, but often it feels like a chore you’ve given me. I have to make reservations, find a baby sitter, figure out how to spend the right amount on food so I don’t end up spending even more (on top of the babysitter) at a restaurant that may not be my cup of tea. So, all this to say, cash is fine. You don’t lack “heart” if you stick to cash. [/quote] Yeah, I think all of this comes down class attitudes. Some groups see giving cash as a bad thing for others it's the standard gift. There is no need to insult anyone's gift whether they want to give an experience, wine, cash, or fine china. Each of those gifts is going to have someone scoff. OP, I think I'm roughly similar set: attorney from a working class Midwest background but a bit younger. Your gift seems fine to me.[/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics