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[quote=Anonymous]OP, you are likely suffering from PPD.  It is extremely common in women -- both those who have and those who have not had any prior terminations -- and is even more common in women who delivered pre-term.

Please obtain a referral from your OB/GYN for counseling.  It's NORMAL to feel this way.  It really is.  But you may well need help to be able to refocus.

Our baby was in the NICU for about two weeks, and I felt tremendous guilt (in my case, about being of "advanced maternal age" -- also a factor linked to preterm birth, along with many, many others).  I felt I didn't deserve my child, and that I had started him off in life with a deficit.   It passed, but it was punishing while it lasted.  My (non-medical, non-expert, personal) opinion is that we have these feelings partly because the baby was a part of *us* for such a long time; we still feel responsible if anything is imperfect after birth.

BTW, our kid is a joyous, energy-filled, age-appropriately-developed kid now.  Only my husband and I remember his time in the NICU, and it is slowly but surely fading for us too.

You have done an AMAZING thing by bringing this new person into the world.  You have been, and will be, a caring, loving, concerned, and happy parent - you will!  Please seek assistance if you don't believe either of the previous two sentences.  Best to you and your family.[/quote]

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