Reply to Present drama--does anyone else's parents do this?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. Thanks for your replies. [b]I guess I need to choose between giving ideas that I know she will ignore and deal with it or my kids receiving stuff that they don’t want/need [/b]and her being on her own but complaining to me that “no one tells her what they want”. That’s my biggest frustration—she complains she doesn’t know what to get, I tell her what to get, she says ok and then doesn’t buy it. Just reject it up front, take my advice or don’t ask at all. But I hate when she acts like I didn’t try to help her (when I absolutely did). There’s just no winning with her. [/quote]

I don’t understand how this is the choice you need to make if, as you say, she really does ignore all your ideas and give them random stuff. Wouldn’t she be giving them random stuff they don’t want/need either way (whether you give her the idea or not)? This year when she makes her snide comments about not knowing what to get just say “I gave you ideas but you didn’t like them.” Then next year when she asks for ideas say “no, you don’t ever like my ideas or get the things I suggest so I’m not going to continue suggesting things.” Then next Christmas she can legitimately say she didn’t know what to get and you can just say nothing. I know that’s not a great solution as it still leaves you feeling annoyed but I don’t think there’s anyway she will change her ways so you just need to accept that she will do what she will do and you can’t control her.

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