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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My sons told me last night that last summer, when I was on a work trip and my husband was working, my parents spanked them after they didn't eat their dinner. I am not surprised (my parents have a terrible temper and this is totally something they would do when frustrated). They told me that they didn't tell me that this happened because they knew I would not let them go to my parents' house unattended. My son said they "slapped him on his bottom real quick". We don't hit or spank. I brought it up with my dad and he admitted it but acted like it was "funny" and that I was "making everything a big deal". What would you do? I told my parents they can no longer be with the boys unattended if this is how they are going to act. For what it's worth, they are both mandated reporters. [/quote]

OP- your father's reaction of trying to pass off his actions as "funny" and telling you that YOU are making it a big deal....that's gaslighting.

You have a parent who is not being transparent with you. He did something he knew you wouldn't like and hid it from you because he knew the potential consequences. Very immature behavior.

Personally, my kids wouldn't be spending time alone with him in the near future.

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