Reply to Anyone else read recent New Yorker article about gay Rutgers freshman who jumped off GW bridge?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What advice do you have, for the right kind of response?  In other words, what would be an acceptable thing for a student to do if they are not comfortable, in response to their roomate having these kinds of meetings with a stranger who is an adult?  Regardless of orientation.[/quote]

I think the best thing to do is to discuss the problems with the RA or with the college housing authority, either of whom could act as an intermediary between the roommates. The key to this situation is that these young men never really spoke to each other. I think if they had, they may have had a chance at co-existing. And if having a gay roommate was really so troubling to Dharun, he could have requested to be moved.

Have you read the New Yorker piece? Towards the end (after Tyler has already committed suicide, but before anyone has realized it) Dharun sent Tyler a thoughtful email in which he says:

"I've known you were gay and I have no problem with it. In fact one of my closest friends is gay and he and I have a very open relationship. I just suspected you were shy about it which is why I never broached the topic. I don’t want your freshman year to be ruined because of a petty misunderstanding, it’s adding to my guilt. You have a right to move if you wish but I don't want you to feel pressured to without fully understanding the situation."

If only they had spoken earlier. They probably would never have become fast friends, but at least they could have co-existed.

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