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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Personal life choices.  [/quote]

You think OP CHOSE to have her parents in poor health?[/quote]

OP chose to have children.  Aging parents is not difficult to predict. [/quote]

Aging, yes. Poor health, no. I know people with parents in their 70s who are active and involved. My own parents are in their 60s with limited mobility. My dad has a serious heart condition. My mom has had a large amount of weight gain in the last 6 years that has caused a host of issues. I would never have anticipated this, and I thought I was making a good choice in having kids while my parents were still “young”. Instead I am in the squeeze of ailing parents (who are likely to continue to struggle for another 15-20 years based on life expectancy in my family) plus young kids. It’s very challenging and no, it’s not something I would have predicted 5 years ago.[/quote]

I get it OP! I am super lucky to have local family who I love and respect and they are actually young enough and healthy enough to both still work! Not full time but quite a lot. I was jealous of my friends whose families would come for weeks when my kids were little and I was using all my leave to be home with the sick baby who couldn’t go to daycare because enough people knew o had local family that they never really understood that I didn’t have back up for those no notice unplanned during the week things. Of course they were able to do more for a younger sibling’s family who lived super close and had kids later when they had cut back on hours more, but they really aren’t ever childcare for us aside from a random weekend evening here or there planned long in advance  (Although that is MUCH appreciated!) my kids are not the easiest anyway.

But I’m mostly just so so grateful that they are reasonably happy and healthy. My in-laws are NOT and my DH worries about them a lot. I am upset the pandemic robbed us of precious time with all the them before things get really bad.[/quote]

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