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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Absolutely. We both add so much to each other’s lives and couldn’t do it without the other.

There’s a weird notion going around that your partner shouldn’t be that important in your life, that you shouldn’t expect to meet each others’ needs. It’s so bizarre to me, I’ve always felt very strongly that marriage is about building a life together, sort of an “us vs the world” thing. I think that idea is mostly perpetuated by people who aren’t interested in being a present partner and want to continue living as if they were single. [/quote]

+1 to the above, especially the "people who aren't interested in being a present partner and want to continue living as if they were single." People here will deny they feel that way, but there are so many posts on DCUM where that is clearly the subtext. The idea seems to be that marriages are nice. optional add-ons for fully formed, "I'll never alter my behaviors to accommodate anyone else" adults. Very little idea of caring enough about another person to want to know them at the deepest level. It's as if some posters want their marriages to be undemanding, surface companionship plus consistently excellent sex with a person whose body will never change Iand if the sex or the body changes, well, they're done), but the idea of sticking together through changes, setbacks, grief, etc. is lost entirely. And nope, not projecting; our 30-year marriage is indeed foundational though we got married in our late 20s. I just despair at some of the posts on this site and wonder why some people bother with the marriage contract and don't just live together or stay single and hook up with like-minded people.[/quote]

Both PP Well said. These are also the people who thinks and advice divorce as the solution to every marital problem.[/quote]

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