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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hello! I am hoping Jeff will please leave this here vs moving to the nanny forum because I’d like advice from parents, please.

I’ve been a nanny for the same family for the past 8 years. During those 8 years, I’ve never received a raise (even when 2 more kids were born) but I accepted it because the parents were nice and I love their children. I don’t receive health benefits or mileage when I use my car. My starting rate was $20 net and I do not receive overtime. I have guaranteed hours, sick days, and 3 weeks vacation. Working for this family, I have to do side jobs to have a quality of life, because I’m in an expensive area. I would have happily continued this arrangement, because of my love for their 3 kids, until pandemic happened.

During pandemic, the family kept me on which I am grateful for, however they let the housekeepers go. Now I had 3 kids (two under 4), distance learning, plus housekeeping and cleaning up all day after the parents. I worked so hard. I was crying most days after work. My boss would tell me how relaxing the pandemic was for and I would silently seethe. For Christmas, I didn’t receive a bonus, when years prior I received a weeks pay. I was hurt, but still grateful to be employed. I love the children so much, I tolerated all the extra job creep and lack of appreciation because the kids make me so happy.

As I mentioned previously, to pay my bills, I have to work side jobs. While my boss went away for 2 weeks this summer (I was paid) I worked for a family through an agency. There is apparently a nanny shortage in my area (big city/high COL area) so wages have skyrocketed. The family paid me $35/hr cash for a newborn and a toddler. I’ve continued babysitting for them on the side (which my boss knows about and is fine with) and they’ve offered me a full time position. The new family know I’ve been with my current employers for many years, but aren’t aware how underpaid I am. They offered me $40/hr gross with overtime, full benefits, mileage, 2 weeks vacation, 5 sick days. They are willing to wait for me until January.

I feel like I need to take this job. I love the kids at work and start to cry whenever I think about leaving, but I’m just so tired. Not from my main job, but from doing that plus all the other side jobs I need to do to get by. I don’t even know how to have to conversation with my boss. We have a weird dynamic where I don’t think the mom actually likes me, but she knows I’m great with the kids and that I am responsible and reliable.

How much notice should I give? After 8 years? I feel like I should give 6 weeks, but I know it the roles were reversed she wouldn’t give me any. Would 4 weeks be sufficient and what can I do to make things easier for the kids? After 8 years I’ll need this reference for the future so I need to leave in the right way. Do I really need to give more than 4 weeks? My bosses are currently working from home, but need to go back to work in January so I know this will be stressful. I just can’t really get past how I was treated during the pandemic and as much as I love the kids, it’s time to move on, but I want to do it the right way. [/quote]

Sorry, but you were an crazy for staying the 2nd year without a raise and a total idiot for staying 8 years with no raise![/quote]

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