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[quote=Anonymous]This is a very odd arrangement.  It's fine you don't want a joint account - and I can sort of see why it makes sense here because of his other daughter. But your DH's reasoning about why he pays for one DD but not the other doesn't make sense.

The bottom line is that your DH has a financial obligation to the child you share together which includes food, clothing, incidentals, medical care, etc.  It's not just about the mortgage, although that is part of it. But the mortgage has nothing to do with you child.  It's for his condo and your child doesn't even live there.  It's not like he's paying a mortgage on a separate house for you and the child to live in.  So the mortgage is not a childcare-related expense.

If he sold the condo, would the proceeds be shared with you and the child?  Because he can't have it both ways.

The mortgage seems like a red herring, though.  It's not really about the mortgage.  He's using it as an excuse to avoid his obligations to your child - financially and emotionally (you said he doesn't spend a lot of time with your child and will do so later.  Nope, sorry).  If you divorced or separated, he would legally be obligated to pay child support.

I'm sorry to say this, but it sounds like you are in a precarious situation.  You are putting all of your savings into the construction, he refuses to pay anything for his second child but still pays the mortgage on a condo he owned before marriage, and spends large sums of money on his first child? Hell no. [/quote]

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