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[quote=Anonymous]Your child is very young.  You will need a network of support.  Those early years are tough.

I have 2 kids. Ex and I split up when the kids were around 10 and 12.  I didn't realize it then, but it was an ideal time.  One in middle school and the other able to walk home by himself with friends.  I was working part-time then and transitioned to full-time 1 year later.  Would go to work early and leave early on days I had the kids so we could have fresh homemade dinners.  Ironically, the custodial agreement forced ex to have to spend more time with the kids, allowing me to work late 2 days a week.  Prior to that it was me in charge of the kids 100%.
Ex was a fairly uninvolved father, and beginning to exhibit violent tendencies towards the children (this had already begun to happen to me). He also embezzled their gift funds.  My attorney wrote a very tightly worded settlement agreement. Upon the split, he had to behave because he'd have to pay for the children's attorney if I chose to challenge his parenting skills.  He now lives a few blocks away, the kids go see him pretty much whenever they want and I don't discourage it.  He is a much better parent than he was before.  Sad that it took a 60 page settlement agreement to get him to be a decent dad.  He was very fearful that he would lose his relationship with them and I didn't want kids with a daddy-complex so I encourage them to spend time with each other and his family who are a big part of his life.

The kids did fantastically after the split up.  We stayed in our home, which was critical for their sense of security and continuity. Both of them tested into selective high schools recently without much effort.  This fact has earned them much respect from their father.
I earned more and was able to afford more extracurriculars and vacations.  Timing was fortunate here too as my increased earnings came AFTER the settlement agreement.  (Prior to that, my income taxes didn't look so hot on paper.) I had been a SAHM and only started working again when the youngest entered full day school in Kindergarten.  My earnings then were a joke but it helped with my retainer fee. That was 8 years ago.  Today I earn more than he does.

It seemed doubtful 8 years ago and I was certain that I was leading the kids to further impoverishment and instability.  But in retrospect, it was the best decision for the kids and me.  
I didn't have anything to lose in seeking a divorce - everything was tied up in his name.  I had nothing back then, hardly a career, no retirement, no joint account funds.  If I had had assets to divide or had to pay him alimony, I don't know that I would have been so fearless in my resolve.
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