Reply to Twin boy in pull ups telling his brother he'd rather wear diapers?

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[quote=Anonymous]Hi.  I have twin boys that will be 10 in a few weeks.  Twin B potty trained easily at 2.5 years old.  He was nighttime trained at about 4.

Twin A, however, has problems with transitions.  He has always rejected doing things until he was ready to do them.  I remember in daycare when he was 2, that the teacher had a loose schedule that she kept.  Each time she moved to another part of the schedule (like playtime to circle time, circle time to snack time, etc) twin A would rebel.  He would be playing and "not be done" and would have a fit wanting to finish what he was doing.  When we tried potty training at 2.5 years old, Twin A, did not want to do it.  He would hide and pee on the floor, or he would just sit and wet his pants and keep playing without letting us know.  We tried twice, at 2 yr 6 mo (when Twin B succeeded) and again at 2 yr 9 mo.  Both times, Twin A, just wouldn't do it and wouldn't cooperate.

At age 3, we put the twins into Montessori, in part because of the self-guided nature of the teaching structure.  We figured that this would make it easier on Twin A giving him more control over what he was learning.  However, the problem was that Twin A was not potty-trained and the Montessori school required that.  So we had Twin A in the local Kindercare at first.  After about 6 weeks, the Montessori schoold had "show off your classroom night".  We went with both boys and Twin B showed us the room, the various stations, the various learning tools that they had.  Twin A loved it there.  He spent the entire hour visit exploring and trying out the tools, etc.  When he asked why he couldn't go there, we told him that they were holding a place for him, but he wasn't allowed to go there until he was potty trained.  He started using the potty the next day.  3 days he was mostly potty trained. 2 weeks later he was potty trained with no accidents for a week.  He really wanted to go to that school!

So, Twin A was potty trained at age 3 because he wanted it.  But there was nothing controlling his nighttime training.  Twin A ended up wearing nightpants until age 7.  He went to a camp that summer.  It was a 5-day day camp, but on Thursday night, they got to stay overnight and camp until the next morning.  He was fine with the nightpants.  He went to the bathroom, got into a stall, changed to nightpants and loose baggy pajamas and the other kids were none the wiser that he was wearing night pants.  But I think that was when he decided he was "ready".  Prior to that camp he was waking up between 2-5 nights a week with wet night pants.  After that camp, it decreased steadily.  By about 2 months after the camp (just after his 8th birthday), he was pretty consistently dry in the morning and switched to pajamas.  That was almost 2 years ago.  He's been fine.

When it comes to night training, that's a lot harder for some kids because it happens subconsciously when they are sleeping.  So they have to be "ready" to night train.  As you can see from my tiwns, potty and night trained in completely different cycles and there wasn't much that we could do about it.  It was really about the child being ready for it.

OP--I would make the night pants and nighttime diapers available to your twin and let him pick.  Every few months, you can can talk to him about it, but it's normal that they may be on different schedules and you shouldn't pressure him to night train.  You can encourage him, but don't put pressure that he needs to do it.  It will happen when he is ready, but consciously and subconsciously.[/quote]

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