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[quote=Anonymous][quote=jsteele][quote=Anonymous]Okay, some of this is persuasive, but you think, with everything that gets discussed here and the way it is discussed, that allowing an off-topic thread to stray further off-topic is what's going to get you badmouthed? And that worry that people will badmouth it is what causes you to interfere? [b]Meantime, you've got black women actually saying that the sheer number of racist posts on here make them feel unwelcome.[/b] Plus, okay, this guardianship post is quite specific. But the ADHD was more of an open ended question, if I recall correctly. Like, has anyone had luck getting their four year old diagnosed with ADHD (I can't remember exactly). So then the conversation turned to medicating, and the pro-medication stuff stayed and the anti-medication was clipped. It skews the conversation. I guess a spin-off thread is the consolation prize. I think I remember that the ADHD thread in question stopped moving once the debate was quashed, though. And I don't see the temp guardianship moving, either. Maybe both OPs didn't think about the fact that the debate was keeping their post at page one, where more people (eventually someone with straight info) might see it.

Oh well. Your site, not mine. Just sharing my thoughts. Appreciate all you do to keep this going.  [/quote]

Since you have brought the issue of racism up more than once now, I want to address that topic specifically. I have been taking steps to combat racist posts of all types. I view operating this site as more of an art than a science. Hence, I don't have one strategy for every problem. Rather, I address different issues in different manners depending on what I believe will work best. Simply because you are not aware of my actions doesn't mean there are no actions. Racism online is a huge problem everywhere. Check out the comment section of almost any newspaper (except those that closely monitor the comments). DCUM is quite tame in comparison. But, the reality remains that if I don't know about something, I can't do anything about it. So, use the "report" button. 
[/quote]

I do use the report button. You seem to be getting really annoyed with me for disagreeing with you. I appreciate that you are taking steps to combat racism. It was just one example of the many ways threads on any anonymous website get out of control. You've made a really visible move in stepping in on threads like this one and the ADHD thread, and I haven't seen the same visibility on other things (such as not just racism, but the thread where people are blaming a mother who lost her child for her child's death on the epi-pen thread). We let that stay, but micromanage threads so that the OP doesn't have to listen to anyone else's view on a hot topic. Okay. Like I said, it is your website. I am a pretty long-time user and I think I nearly always have advice or something positive to say. I go out of my way to help people on this thread. If, sometimes, my desire to help means pointing out another way to look at the problem, I think it is valid. My parents divorce was completely devastating to me. My time with my aunt was horrible. They loved me so much, but I kept feeling like unwanted baggage. It is a proven fact that most children believe they are to blame at least in part for a divorce. So when dad skips off to another country and mom moves to be closer to family but does not take her children, that makes me think of how I felt as a kid. OP could explain the situation but she didn't want to. She just covered up her ears and said "I'm not listening, la la la" and you institutionalized that by meddling on the thread. PLease don't take my comments personally. If you trace my IP address you can see who I am, we've agreed on 99 percent of issues. I like you and like this website. I just think this practice of shutting off alternate POVs is not cool. I guess now I'm just being a pain in the ass about it. You've made your decision and it's not like I can really change your mind by badgering. I'm simply defending my point of view at this point, because your'e making me feel like I'm some kind of bully who shuts down threads with vitriol and mean-spirited replies when I feel I'm one of the posters who goes out of her way to be thoughtful and kind to others on this website most of the time. Like anyone, I definitely have my moments where I get frustrated or angry with another poster, but I'm not derailing threads with vitriol by any means. Oh well. I've said what I need to say now. I'm not going to keep fighting for the last word. Just hope you'll consider what I and others are saying about this with an open mind. [/quote]

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