Reply to Would You Date Someone Who Used To Be Overweight?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Would You Date Someone Who Used To Be Overweight? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]Counterpoint to some of these responses.

I know a woman who was never obese but was definitely overweight in her 20s. She started to lose the weight right around 30 and became very diet and exercise conscious. She went from probably a size 10 or so down to a size 2. She really loved being that thin and became semi-obsessed with herself, posting lots of photos of herself on social media, getting really into fashion that showed it off, etc. All fine, no judgment. She met and married a man during this era of her life.

Turns out she had a borderline eating disorder and was also semi-addicted to working out. I don't think she was super unhealthy before she lost the weight (probably could have stood to exercise more, but I really don't think she ever had issues with food before she started slimming down). She has gained some but not all of the weight back. But the real issue is that she has food issues, self image issues, and now health issues related to her up and down weight. She has a persistent thyroid condition that has to be medicated and can really impact her mood and energy levels (hard to say if the thyroid issue came before the initial weight loss or maybe has been exacerbated by unhealthy dieting and this kind of feast or famine approach to exercise). She also has multiple chronic injuries due to her earlier exercise obsession and now it is harder for her to find ways to exercise healthfully.

It's not so much that her weight loss was a sign that she was going to gain it back. It's that those kinds of transformations can be a huge change in someone's life and might indicate some other underlying issues. I don't think it's automatically shallow to be a bit put off by someone who did a 180 on weight at some point, in the same way that I might be put off by someone who converted to a totally new religion in their late 20s, or some other fundamental shift in behavior. I might wonder if they would be overzealous (no zealot like a convert, as they say), or masking other issues. I wouldn't write them off automatically, but it might throw up a red flag. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics