Reply to S/o another finances & step parent Q

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[quote=Anonymous]I am a stepchild, and one VERY critical of the other OP. IMO your situation is not comparable.

1) You are not married so the financial aid issue isn't a factor (and that is a HUGE factor over there, her DD is literally being punished for the marriage, its not even a neutral thing)

2) Your daughter is 15 and you're not even married yet. In the other post, they married when the daughter was 12/13 and I assume therefore the guy had been in the kid's life since she was 10. That is a LOT longer and from a much younger age and IMO translates to an expectation of a much more parental relationship.

3) Sounds like his kids are either in college or on their way, so there won't be a substantial period of time for these kids to feel like 'siblings' and then be treated extremely differently.

4) Sounds like you and your partner can discuss these things and isn't some verboten thing

It really isn't the same scenario. Those 5-6 years of difference are foundational years of a kid's development. And you aren't saddling her with an extreme financial consequence.

I would say to ensure that as you move forward that there are not extreme discrepancies at holidays/birthdays etc and that when you travel as a family everyone gets the same treatment. That is where your resentment could lie, not in stuff like this. [/quote]

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