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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  To add context, I was molested at age 7 by a family member, so my radar is up.  I spoke with my daughter yesterday and told her that no one should touch her without her permission, no matter who it is.  I don't want to set her up for a "world of issues with men", but I also don't want her woken up sexually at age 9 by a cousin.  Thank you for your guidance.  I think the suggestion about cutting back on xyz might help mitigate and send the message without accusing him of inappropriate behavior.  Thank you.[/quote]

I don't think this is necessarily creepy or dangerous between cousins.  When I was a 15 year old teen boy, I was babysitting for several families, one of which had twin 9-year old boys and a 7 year old girl.  One of the reasons I was a popular babysitter was that I would take the kids out in the yard and would play around with them and lift them up and run them around playing tag and such.  And that involved tickling and touching the 7 year old girl.  She was treated the same as her brothers.   It was not sexual, it was clearly children's play.

OP--I think your warning radar is up based on your background.  That doesn't say that the cousin's actions are or are not necessarily dangerous, but your experience makes you much more aware and sensitive to the danger that could be there.  I would suggest that you talk to the cousins and say that the tickling and touching should only be done when they are in common spaces, in view of adults.  This is not something that should be done when they are playing in rooms where the adults cannot see them.  You can advise your daughter that if this type of behavior happens somewhere out of sight that she should let you know and you can deal with it.  If it is crossing the line into dangerous or sexual, being in view of adults should be a deterrence. [/quote]

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